what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
