i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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