It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize
