I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
