I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
