The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
