She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
they need to just BURY HIM!
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
