i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
