if only i could text you this smell
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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