so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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