She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Randomize
