Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
