We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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