You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
i just google imaged poop.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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