I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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