i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Randomize
