So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
