do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
