I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
