Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize
