Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i would punch a child for taco bell
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Randomize
