dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Randomize
