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Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
one might say we're banned from that church
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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