good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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