operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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