I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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