If that was your dad, he is hot
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
