When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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