What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
