I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
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