Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
