East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
