so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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