porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Green mimosas i think yes
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
