yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
