he wants to bone in the snuggie
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize