Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
