I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
