Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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