We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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