my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
