Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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