..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
