oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
