Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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