If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
