Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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