why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Sober January is a disaster.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
my poor anus
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
