dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
