you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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